Relality of relationships

When you find your true love, one tends to generally jump in and give their all only to find out later that it is not what they have expected.
It is not uncommon that you find that you and your partner pass the honeymoon period and start annoying each other. Of course, we are only human and we tend to do things that might bother others and maybe even annoy our life partner. That isn't truly the problem. The problem is that we as humans tend to only expect good things out of people and thus only accept their good traits completely rejecting the flaws. In the process, we end up not only hurting others but also ourselves by making it harder for the relationship to sustain. So what is the solution?

1. Talk to each other: communication is of course the key. Keep an open mind and also allow your partner to talk. Make a safe place for both of you to talk without judgment.

2. Accept without condition: what most people do is they only accept their friends and families for all the good things they bring and get annoyed at their bad behavior or things that annoy them. That is not healthy. Imagine if you only watched the great parts of Game of Thrones, and skipped the tortures and torments. You would miss the point of the story and wouldn't enjoy the series in its entirety. Similarly, you can't just like someone's good attributes and reject the attributes that you don't like. This way you are rejecting the whole person and thus missing on the whole experience. This doesn't only hurt your relationship but also your partner. Sometimes it can even break them. So be careful.

3. Don't apologize for their behavior: I have seen many couples doing that and it does not help anyone. You apologizing for your partners behavior shows you disapprove of them. That is not ok. If you think they were wrong, go back to point 1 but never ever apologize for your partner's behavior.

4. Don't force them to do things against their will: sometimes if someone loves you enough, they will do anything for you. But making them do something they don't want to do can hurt the relationship. Sure they might do it for your sake but at what cost, resentment growing inside their heart might be too much for it to sustain the relationship later. Think before you ask something of him/her. Think about what it means to them. What it can do to them. Don't make your partner do anything for you that can be of high emotional cost to them. This can not only destroy your relationship but can also ruin your partner's mental stability. This is one of the key things that most people don't pay importance to.
This includes no gaslighting, no emotional blackmail and any form of emotional abuse.

5. Don't pretend things are fine when they are not: pretending never solves anything. Address the issue. Simple.

6. Don't bring in stereotypes: don't expect the girl to do household work or the guy to earn just because"that's how it's done". Share the responsibility if and when possible.

7. Don't expect them to be buddies with your family: yes, of course, some people are great with their partner's families but it is not ok for you to expect that out of your partner. They might not be ok with being that close or might not be able to become close to your folks due to various factors. Either way it expecting this from your partner will make them feel incompetent and question their capabilities. It can sometimes work like gaslighting which is definitely not healthy.
Truth be told your parent doesn't want to talk to you partner anyways, they just want to hear your voice. If they are asking about your partner, it's either to show you they care about her (courtesy) or they want to make him/her seem like the bad guy. So spare your partner. She/he has a life that is hard already, don't make it harder by having weird expectations from them.

8. Show Empathy: be careful with their feelings. We, humans, are fragile. Don't say or do things that might hurt them. If you love them, care about not hurting them.

There are only so many things you learn from an article. What I have written here is what I know about my experience. All I can add to this is that Remember it is a 2-way street, you can only expect to get when you also give.